I am looking for a novel that I first read around 2000. A girl's (German, late teens I believe) father dies. She marries a much older friend of the family. She doesn't know that he is having an affair with her mother. He is like a father to her. She gets older, he gets drunk, rapes her. She gets pregnant. They come to America on a ship. He dies.

They were going to settle in the midwest I believe. To take possession of some land she has to be married. She gets a cowboy (?) to marry her for a year or so and then leave.

She has the baby, it is stillborn so the new husband throws it in a river to shock it back to life.

That is all I can remember. Any information would be appreciated. Thanks!